belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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