wat bout pragnant strippers??
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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