I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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