i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Randomize
