physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
