When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
