someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
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