I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
