I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I love you. Go after that dick
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Randomize