question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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