you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
