You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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