Yo dont text me then not text me
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize
