And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
