i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
