"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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