If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize