You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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