Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Randomize
