yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
