their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
