I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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