Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Found your dick twin last night
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Randomize
