i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Randomize
