I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
