my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
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