Where is the hickey?
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize