How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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