Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
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