i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
