the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
