Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
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