Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Dick very happy bro
Randomize
