I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
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