I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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