Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
My bed smells like the plague
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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