It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
