You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
