But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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