your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
why does every cop we meet know your name?
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
