No stitches, just platelets and will power
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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