Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
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