he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I have so many feelings about this burrito
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
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