absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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