Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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