dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Randomize
