don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize