We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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