we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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