i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
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