All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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